Thursday, February 14, 2008
Professor X Goes to Paris
Airport security has been pretty interesting ever since 911. I honestly couldn't tell you if travel has gotten any safer despite the security guards holding their M16s at the security check. Over the summer, I took a commercial flight. I carry tear gas and a 5'' knife in my purse on any given day...and accidently forgot to remove these items from my purse and put them into my checked luggage before the security checkpoint. I was a little nervous, but remained calm as I placed my purse onto the conveyor belt. I figured that they would probably just pull me aside and confiscate my weapons of destruction. Maybe they would scold me. Maybe I was going to be in deep shit. I really didn't know. Well, my purse made it through security without a second glance...and I walked calmly onto the unsuspecting plane. Should I be happy that I didn't get stopped? Should I be horrified?
Professor X has not been so lucky with travel. He told us the following story to keep us from falling asleep during his lecture on Java Programming:
"I was very frustrated when I got to the airport. From the moment I walked into the building the people were wanting to check my bags every 5 feet. When I finally got through security I decided to upgrade to first class. I was very excited because there was a spot available. Then the woman at the desk told me that the pilot wanted to speak to me. I was kind of suprised. The pilot came to me and wanted to buy me coffee at the McDonalds. Did you know that these pilots don't have to pay for any of the food at airports? After he got me my coffee, he put his arm around my shoulder and asked, 'How do you feel about foreign policies in this country?' I told him that I liked them just fine, to which he responded, 'Good! Just want to make sure we have a safe flight.' I asked him what foreign policy had to do with him flying the plane safely...Deep down I was a bit offended. I think I gave him some choice words after explaining to him that I have been in this country for 18 years."
The class got really quiet. We really didn't know what to say. We felt sorry for the guy. I could just imagine him...all dressed up in one of his plaid flannel shirts and khaki pants that were pulled up a little too high over his round belly. It was just depressing.
"Hmm...I guess this story isn't so funny. I take things like this with a light heart. Another time, a woman came up to me to offer me some food. I told her that I couldn't have this food because I was fasting, to which she responded, 'Ohh...You're one of those people that flew the planes into the buildings in New York.' I told her, 'No...I didn't get the e-mail in time.' She did not think this was funny. I thought this was funny. Do you? Oh never mind...I give up. Class is over."
Poor Professor. All those people were worried about him getting onto the plane while people like me (complete with raging hormones, tear gas, and a 5'' knife) are walking through security without a care in the world. It is pretty ridiculous.
Professor X has not been so lucky with travel. He told us the following story to keep us from falling asleep during his lecture on Java Programming:
"I was very frustrated when I got to the airport. From the moment I walked into the building the people were wanting to check my bags every 5 feet. When I finally got through security I decided to upgrade to first class. I was very excited because there was a spot available. Then the woman at the desk told me that the pilot wanted to speak to me. I was kind of suprised. The pilot came to me and wanted to buy me coffee at the McDonalds. Did you know that these pilots don't have to pay for any of the food at airports? After he got me my coffee, he put his arm around my shoulder and asked, 'How do you feel about foreign policies in this country?' I told him that I liked them just fine, to which he responded, 'Good! Just want to make sure we have a safe flight.' I asked him what foreign policy had to do with him flying the plane safely...Deep down I was a bit offended. I think I gave him some choice words after explaining to him that I have been in this country for 18 years."
The class got really quiet. We really didn't know what to say. We felt sorry for the guy. I could just imagine him...all dressed up in one of his plaid flannel shirts and khaki pants that were pulled up a little too high over his round belly. It was just depressing.
"Hmm...I guess this story isn't so funny. I take things like this with a light heart. Another time, a woman came up to me to offer me some food. I told her that I couldn't have this food because I was fasting, to which she responded, 'Ohh...You're one of those people that flew the planes into the buildings in New York.' I told her, 'No...I didn't get the e-mail in time.' She did not think this was funny. I thought this was funny. Do you? Oh never mind...I give up. Class is over."
Poor Professor. All those people were worried about him getting onto the plane while people like me (complete with raging hormones, tear gas, and a 5'' knife) are walking through security without a care in the world. It is pretty ridiculous.
# posted by The Runt @ 8:25 PM 
