The Lazy Gnome...

It was so pretty on Saturday that I decided to take my dogs on a nice walk through the neighborhood. As you may recall, Teddy was still recovering from his surgery, so he still had to wear his lampshade. As if he wasn't embarrassed enough, it was still pretty nippy out...so I put on his sweater along with the lampshade. He seemed a little nervous at first, but after a block or so he seemed to be more comfortable with his appearance despite the cars that would slow down to figure out just what in the world I was walking down the street. We were about three blocks from the safety of my apartment...that's when it happened. Our walk was cut short because Teddy needed to take a poop, and the poop got stuck in his butt hair. He tried to run away from the poop that was clinging on to him, but he could not escape it. I tried to help him by poking at the cling-on with a stick, but it was no use. All the while cars were passing by...slowing down to observe the situation. Teddy then decided to try to scoot across the grass on his bottom in an attempt to wipe it off. This was a terrible idea. Teddy successfully smeared poop all over his bottom. He tried to turn his head to see what was going on back there. In doing so, Teddy got poop all over his lampshade. What is a mother to do? You could see the embarrassment and horror in his face. He wanted me to pick him up and carry him home, but that would mean getting poop all over me. Dolly and I were pretty embarrassed to be seen with Teddy at this point. Even worse, Teddy wasn't allowed to take a bath for at least another week. We dragged Teddy home and made the executive decision to disregard doctor's orders and give him a sort of sponge bath. Poor Teddy. No more long walks until he gets a haircut.